Books
These three books are a great starting point for beginning to learn about kink.
The New Topping Book and New Bottoming Book: Janet Hardy and Dossie Easton. Regardless of the roll that you like to play (top or bottom), both books are worth reading to get an easily digestible wide ranging view on the topic. In addition, I recommend...
Leathersex: Joseph Bean. I recommend this one because it offers a glimpse into some of the history of leather culture and also offers lots of how to information. While it's written by and for a gay male audience, I recommend it to everyone; leather culture as we know it started with gay men and I feel that it's important to know this history, regardless of ones orientation.
For an introduction to some of the tools that are helpful in finding success navigating your relationships, check out the following.
8 Things I Wish I'd Known About Poly Before I Tried and Frackked It Up: Cunning Minx. This book is a goldmine. Short, sweet, and to the point; it distills a ton of information from the Poly Weekly podcast into book form. Highly recommended.
Relationship Agreements: Eri Kardos. Similar to the above title, this one is also intended to be used as a workbook. It offers a thoughtful look at the unspoken agreements that often govern our relationships and provides a framework for bringing them out into the open where they can be discussed.
Online Resources
The folks over at kink.com produce Kink University, an amazing collection of well produced educational (and hot) videos on a whole range of topics. You can check them out here. It's absolutely worth the subscription.
www.kink.com/channel/kinkuniversity
Fetlife is a kinky social networking site. In addition to being a great play to find a huge range of user generated content and writing about kink, there's also local groups you can join to get in touch with other kinksters in your area.
Tyler the Bad Wolf is an NYC based sex worker and writer. He keeps a blog that I enjoy reading for the insight it offers into sexuality and the sex industry as well for his thoughts on the nuances of gay culture. Not to mention all the awesome porn that he curates. Check it out here.
Tina Horn is an all around badass. She writes, performs and teaches, among other things. She runs a podcast called “Why Are People Into That” that I recommend highly. Check out her website here.
In Person
Some places that I enjoy when I'm looking to go out for an evening of music and dancing or a bit of shopping are...
The Cuff: A Seattle institution, The Cuff is a gay leather bar on Capitol Hill. One of my favorite places for happy hour and a game of pool.
Pony: Also located on Capitol Hill, Pony is a great place for a night of dancing. An explicitly queer venue, Pony is welcoming to folks across the gender and/or sexuality spectrum. They've got consistently good music, affordable drinks, and a great patio.
Wild at Heart: Located in Ballard, Wild at Heart is a woman owned sex shop with a great selection of toys, books and costumes. In particular they feature toys and gear made by local Seattle artisans.
Doghouse Leathers: Just a block away from The Cuff, Doghouse is the place in Seattle for leather clothing and accessories. They also stock a wide variety of toys, condoms, lubes, and other goodies. Definitely worth checking out if you're in the neighborhood.
Babeland: Right next door to the new Doghouse location is Babeland, another sex positive Seattle institution.